By Makayla Munoz.
I woke up today with clouds looming above my head. Technically, I was a bit cloudy; however, figuratively there was cloudy forecast too. I got ready and headed out the door trying to convince myself I will be happy today. As I drove to the train station, I played my current favorite playlist thinking that would fight my wave of sadness. I kept telling myself, “You are fine, don’t be a baby.”
I got to school and immediately absorbed myself in school work, so I did not have to spend time with my thoughts. My friend arrived and I told myself to give her a fake smile. As class started, I threw myself into the task at hand and tried to not get lost in my thoughts. Flash forward, it is 11:50 and I am exhausted. Mentally, I am reaching my limit for the day; however, I have one more class to get through. My professor notices I am off. I just say I do not feel well and agree when she asks if I feel a little under the weather. Little does she know that the weather I am under is this cloudy storm that is brewing inside me.
I am finally on my way home, exhausted and drained. As I get closer to home, I feel the emotions building up. I am a shaken up pop bottle ready to explode. I am at home alone with my intruding thoughts. I sit down to finish writing a blog post I promised to have by the end of today. Then, everything comes unraveled. Tears start streaming from my eyes, as if someone turned on a faucet full force and let it run. I keep trying to compose myself, but to no avail.
Then, I pick up the phone and message my best friend. I talk to her, tell her how I feel, and let her know what is going on in my mind currently. She reassured me that everything will be okay and it is just a bad mental day. After our little chat, I feel a lot more relieved. I still do not feel completely myself, but the mental clouds are gone and I feel slightly more normal.
I sat down to write this little post to give myself a little bit of relief. Also, I wrote this to remind everyone that it is okay to have bad days. We are all humans after all and even the most “perfect” of people can have their bad days. I am here to remind you that you are not alone; there are people that are going through what you are too. Just remember, that there are people you could talk to, whether it is a school counselor, a professor, a friend, a family member, or even a stranger online. It is important to talk about your feelings, instead of bottling it up until you explode. This is a reminder to not let your blues get the best of you.